·˚ ༉‧₊ •• 𝖘𝖔𝖑𝖔: 𝖌𝖆𝖘𝖔𝖑𝖎𝖓𝖊 𝖒𝖊𝖊𝖙𝖘 𝖋𝖎𝖗𝖊 𝖕𝖆𝖗𝖙 𝖔𝖓𝖊, 𝖈𝖍𝖆𝖕𝖙𝖊𝖗 𝖙𝖍𝖎𝖗𝖙𝖊𝖊𝖓 •• ˚✧

 

   ·˚ ༉‧₊ •• 𝖘𝖔𝖑𝖔: 𝖌𝖆𝖘𝖔𝖑𝖎𝖓𝖊 𝖒𝖊𝖊𝖙𝖘 𝖋𝖎𝖗𝖊 𝖕𝖆𝖗𝖙 𝖔𝖓𝖊, 𝖈𝖍𝖆𝖕𝖙𝖊𝖗 𝖙𝖍𝖎𝖗𝖙𝖊𝖊𝖓 •• ˚✧

 ◇─◇──◇────◇────◇

“..fragments of you linger in my bones, in my dreams, in the palm of my hand. you slip between the cracks and make my body; your home..”

• °. CHAPTER THIRTEEN - GASOLINE MEETS FIRE PART ONE • °.

The trauma that had help Michaela down had slowly been removed from her ankles, she was slowly starting to figure out who she truly was and how she should 𝐦𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐨𝐧 from all the pain that she had been dealt these past couple of years. Did that mean she was over it? No, not at all. She was still confused and in a state of shock. She never thought that this would be her life nor did she ever think that she would love someone like 𝐡𝐢𝐦. Everything about the blue-eyed devil should’ve made her skin crawl but it was actually the opposite. She wanted him. She needed him, she longed for him. How could she feel this way about him? She had no idea. Michaela couldn’t wrap her head around her current state of mind. What was wrong with her? How could she still feel love towards him? She wanted to know the truth and figure out what happened to hear and now that she knew; she couldn’t get him out of her head. It was constantly stuck on him. Joshua Grant had gotten into her blood stream and Michaela couldn’t get him out of her system even if she tried. Maybe it was because she had never met anyone that knew how 𝐝𝐚𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐝 she was and still wanted her or maybe it was because he was the first man to truly touch her heart. Michaela loved Shawn but that relationship was fake, nothing about them was 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥. Michaela had only stayed with Shawn to help him figure out who he truly was but it was Josh that helped Michaela figure out who 𝐬𝐡𝐞 truly was. They shared a 𝐭𝐰𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐟𝐚𝐭𝐞 and they were bound to one another until one of them took their last breathe. Michaela knew this but if this was true, did that mean she was just as psychotic as him..?

“𝐅𝐨𝐨𝐥𝐞𝐝 𝐛𝐲 𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐨𝐰𝐧 𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐬, 𝐬𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐰𝐢𝐬𝐭 𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐟𝐚𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥 𝐡𝐢𝐦.”

Dark chocolate curls loosely fall around my petite shoulders as my fingers comb through them, a faint sigh emitted from plump lips as my eyes fixated upon the screen “Michaela are you going to stay locked up in that room all day?” The voice caused my head to shake slightly, and my eyelids blinked a couple of times as the thoughts that lingered in my head slowly faded away. “And, what if I am?” I had managed to utter, my dark orbs still locked onto the images on the screen. There he was again, his eyes lingering on mine and the smile on his lips was wide and the memory of this specific day played in my mind so vividly. It was before all the pain, before the betrayal–it was a moment that played in my mind when I found myself longing for him. I knew that this wasn’t a good idea and that I should be disgusted by him but I couldn’t help myself. I missed him, I missed when we were innocent. “Excuse me, what the hell is this?” My head shifted from the screen onto Selina, my eyes widened as I quickly slammed my laptop shut, and nervous laughter emitted from the depths of my throat. “It’s..it’s..” Selina lifted her palm upward, shaking her head as she spoke, “I don’t want to hear it. You should know better than this. I know that a piece of you will always love that loser and wish that things were different but the truth is..” Selina paused as her palm slowly dropped and she signed, her head shaking as the words continued to roll off her tongue. “That he stole your happiness. He is the reason that you no longer believe in love and the reason that you ran from California to be here with me. You’ve spent these past two years falling apart because of him. We are in Paris but you are still in California. You have to let him go, Mouse. He isn’t good for you and I am tired of seeing you this way, you’ve become a shell of the girl you used to be. Don’t you want to leave that version of you in the past? I know it will be hard but you have to move on.” The words that left Selina’s mouth were true, Josh was the main reason that I became the person I am today. I wasn’t in the right place when we met, I had just lost my father and I was already down a dangerous path but he only made it worse.

I nodded my head, and a faint sigh elicited from my throat. “I know that you are right and I know that I need to let him go because nothing good can come of this. I know who he truly is and I know that he will never change. I’m sorry for everything that I have put you through as my best friend.” The lines twisted into a small smile as my arms wrapped around Selina’s lithe physique and I pulled her into my arms. “It’s nothing you need to apologize for but you need to be strong, you have to let him go and truly give yourself a fresh start.” Selina slightly pulled away and pressed her lips against my forehead in a chaste kiss. “I’m only giving you one more day to linger on your feelings for him but after today, no more. Okay?” I couldn’t utter a response so I just nodded my head and languidly released my arms from her waist. “I’m going out, get some rest and we will have a girls' day tomorrow.”

The conversation with Selina continued to play in my mind, I knew that she was right and that I should let Josh go but how could I do that? I didn’t even remember how he got into my heart in the first place. When did I lose myself to him? Was it when we first met? I don’t know the moment that I truly fell for him but I knew that it would be hard to let him go..he was in my bloodstream. My head rested against the blush pillow, my dark orbs fixated upon the ceiling fan as my eyes slowly fluttered shut, “Joshua..” His name dripped from my throat in a hushed tone and sleep slowly crept over me as my mind was once more consumed by the blue-eyed devil.

● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ●● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ●● ● ● ● ● ● 

“M, all of me is meant for you and only you. The sooner you stop fighting our love, the sooner we can be together.” Cracking a slow and triumphant grin, Josh silently hooked a finger around the thin fabric of my panties and walked past me, pulling on the lace like a leash for me to follow. “You are mine.” Joshua stopped once we reached his bed and nudged me to sit at the edge as he pulled his shirt off, tossing it to the side. Dropping to his knees, he pulled my hips downward and slipped my legs open, trailing slow supple kisses up my thigh. “Stop fighting your feelings for me, M.” My tongue wet my lips as he propped my legs open, whimpering softly as he placed soft kisses up my inner thigh. This was definitely a bad idea but I wanted to sin with the devil. “Josh..What are you doing?” Hungry, wet, and deviously slow kisses lined my thighs until he finally reached my lace-clad pussy, pulling the fabric to the side. A guttural, breathy moan swept past his lips as he continued his kisses, starting from my already throbbing clit and moving down with ease before swiping his tongue back up. Josh repeated the process, greedily slipping his tongue in between my folds, teasing my entrance without ever prying his gaze from me. “M, don’t ask questions you know the answer to.” Anchoring his hands against my thighs to keep my hips still, he swirled his tongue over my clit, tracing patterns and gently sucking for the perfect amount of friction to watch my body writhe under his grasp. “Fuck, M.” Watching me unfold was fuel to the fire that was already ignited in his core, raging to feel, taste and fuck me until we were both sweat-slicked and breathless. Lapping up my wetness with the flat of his tongue, his lips went back to work on my clit, sucking and dragging tight circles of added friction while his fingers slipped in between my legs, massaging my soaked folds. “You are mine.” Lifting his head up and abandoning my clit momentarily, he slowly sank his middle and index finger into my entrance; ravenously licking his lips as he watched in awe at how perfect my walls constricted around his digits. “You belong to me.” Josh pumped his fingers in and out at an agonizingly slow pace for the both of us, muttering a series of curses under his breath. “You burn for me and me alone.” A smirk ghosted across his features before he rolled his tongue back to its rightful place against my clit, sloppily tracing the letters of his name along the aching nub; all while keeping up with the pace of his fingers. “Wake up, Emerald, and come back to me.”

● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ●● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ●● ● ● ● ● ●

My eyes sprung open, whiskey-tainted hues scanned the dark room as I swiftly lifted myself upward and pulled the dark duvet against my chest. “I’m coming..” Those were the words that managed to escape from my throat and at that moment, I knew that I could never let him go, and no matter what had happened between the two of us…my heart belonged to him.

"𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐜𝐫𝐚𝐯𝐞𝐝 𝐟𝐢𝐫𝐞 𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭 𝐦𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐟𝐞𝐥𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐥𝐝. 𝐒𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐡𝐚𝐝 𝐚𝐥𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐛𝐞𝐞𝐧 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐛𝐛𝐢𝐧𝐠 —𝐚𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐛𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐝. 𝐀𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐡𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐨𝐬 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐝 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧 𝐰𝐢𝐜𝐤 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐰𝐚𝐱, 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐬𝐤𝐢𝐧 𝐧𝐞𝐚𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬, 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐬, 𝐚𝐭 𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐭, 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐟𝐞𝐥𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐦𝐭𝐡."