⋆ CHAPTER FIVE - FIRE AND DESIRE I ⋆

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“I know we're not in love; love is vivid. No, we're not in love; you fall right in it for a week, a month, or maybe just a minute or a lifetime. What's the difference? Big bang or collision, love is blind; we had a vision though, but now we are dead roses.”

⋆ CHAPTER FIVE - FIRE AND DESIRE I ⋆

Every traumatic event in your life was once filled with good intentions, maybe even a dash of hope. Maybe you thought you could shake the shackles that your family put you in--that society put you in. Maybe you pictured how your life would go, have dreams and goals. You probably even thought that you could make it big, find the love of your life, and live happily ever after. But does happily ever after really exist? I think it doesn’t because if it did, then maybe I could’ve got the girl, and maybe I wouldn’t have hurt her as I did. Maybe I could’ve seen that she was already broken, but instead, I just added it to the list and made her feel alone, and the worst part is that I liked it; I loved the moans that she uttered. Could it be considered rape if she made those sounds? Sounds that I couldn’t get out of my head. Why couldn’t she just want me? If she had just admitted that she felt the same for me, then maybe we could’ve had a happily ever after, but instead, we have been marked as a tragedy, and nothing I do now will change how she feels about me, she will never want me, and it’s my own fault. I should’ve just seen the signs, but I didn’t.

Who am I? My name is Joshua Grant. Most people call me Josh, and I’m completely in love with Michaela Williams, or is it more of an obsession? Either way, she’s gotten into my bloodstream; her scent alone brings me to my knees, and she tastes incredible. I can never get enough of her, even when I try, and trust me, I have tried. You’ve probably heard Michaela’s side, and I wouldn’t blame you if you hate me now; she probably painted me as a monster. I wasn’t always this way; I just couldn’t stop thinking about her and how much I needed her--let me take you to how it started.

ᴛɪᴄᴋᴇᴛꜱ ᴛᴏ ᴍʏ ᴅᴏᴡɴꜰᴀʟʟ—ᴊᴏꜱʜ'ꜱ ᴘᴏɪɴᴛ ᴀ ᴠɪᴇᴡ

The pads of his fingers pressed against the keys on his computer, and a smirk curled upon his lips as he nodded his head a few times. The words poured out of his mind and onto the lit screen. Joshua was pleased with the pieces he was creating—his mind was a mess, but the words brought him happiness and made him come alive. Joshua lived for moments like this, and writing was truly his passion. “Dude, what the hell are you doing?” Groan drifts from his lips, cobalt irises locked on the screen as his fingers continue to glide against the keys. “I’m writing; what does it look like I'm doing?” Josh’s head shook as he spoke. “Josh, we all know you are a broody writer and rather spend College writing whatever the fuck you write, but it’s move-in day, and you know what that means, correct?” The question that Tyler uttered caused Josh to halt momentarily, his cobalt hues drifted from the computer screen as he slowly turned himself around. The smirk on his lip widened as Josh and Tyler both uttered the next line,” Fresh meat.” Tyler nodded his head a few times. “That’s the fucking spirit! You can finally get over your ex, and I can get laid.” Josh placed his palms against his dark jeans, his head shaking as he stood to his full stature. “Tyler, you are my boy, but we both know that you will die a virgin. Just own that fact. It will be less embarrassing for you.” Tyler narrowed his eyes at Josh, “Fuck you.” Josh pressed his palm on Tyler’s shoulder blade as he spoke, “Nah, you're not my type. Let’s go—I'll be your wingman because you will definitely need my help.”

Josh had played this game many times; that’s how he met Rebecca, his ex-girlfriend. He was trying to help Tyler get a girl, and she ended up wanting him, but it didn’t end well. It never did, Josh could always get the girl, but he could never keep them—he either got bored with them or didn’t give them enough attention, and then it was the constant nagging. Josh was rather tired of this game, but on the other hand, he enjoyed it. It was good for his ego. He always made sure that he came out a winner, he knew that deep down Tyler hated him for it, but they had been best mates since they were in diapers, so that meant Tyler could never stay mad at Josh. “Man, all of these freshmen aren’t doing it for me this year.” Josh shifted his gaze towards Tyler, chuckling. “Are you even trying? I haven’t seen you move from that spot.” Tyler rolled his brown eyes. “Everyone can’t be as smooth as you. You use your brooding charm, and the girls come running.” Josh lifted his shoulders upward in a nonchalant shrug. “Maybe you should stop fixating on me and actually try talking to one of these girls that have smiled at you, aye?” Josh was aware that Tyler hadn’t made a move on anyone because he was worried that they would want him and they would have a Rebecca issue once more, but Josh wasn’t interested in speaking to anyone; he needed to focus on the novel he was writing and school this year.  Dating wasn’t a part of his plan. 

“Are you fucking kidding me?” The sound of her voice pulled him out of his thoughts, his cobalt hues skimmed her features, and her dark tresses were tossed into a messy bun; the ivory top slightly pulled down due to her leaning forward caused her breast to pour out of her chest slightly. Josh’s mouth became dry, and he cleared his throat, which caused muted coughs to emit. “I’ll be back, Ty.” The words escaped his lips, he pushed himself off the wall as his focus was still on her, his tongue wetted his lips as he watched her; every step taking him closer to his prey, Josh couldn’t take his eyes off her, and he didn’t want to. “Are you okay?” His words tumbled outward, she shook her head slightly as she lifted her head upward, and her emerald irises connected with his. His heart rate picked up, and he couldn’t control the rate it was beating.  “I doubt it, and I’m pretty sure my computer was in this box.” Her voice sounded like the sweetest sound, and he leaned downward to meet her at eye level; he shook his head to pull himself out of the trance she had him under. “May I?” He questioned; her nod meant that she didn’t mind; his bawdy digits swiftly pulled open the box as he scanned the items in the box. He smiled and shook his head. “You are in luck, and it’s just makeup.” Soft melodic laughter left her throat as her head rattled slightly, and her gaze shifted towards the items in the box. “I swear in another lifetime I was a blonde, no offense to you.” Josh smiled. “None taken do you need help?” He extended his hand outward, and she nodded her head as her petite fingers intertwined with his as he pulled them both up. The warmth from her touch caused his heart rate to pick up once more, and their eyes were connected as his face hovered over hers. 

Josh was completely in awe of her beauty, love, at first, sight, was definitely what he felt with her, and he wanted more.

“You know you can let go of my hand now, right?” She smirked as her fingers slipped away from his grip. “I’m sorry, but the offer still stands. Do you need help?” Josh usually didn’t find himself so lost in someone’s presence before, but she was different, and he wanted to be near her; no, he needed to be near her. “No, I’m just waiting for my best friend; she should be here in a bit. What’s your name?” Her answer left a sour taste in his mouth, but he didn’t want to show her that side of him. “Joshua, but you can call me Josh.” He mirrored her smile, and the two were still inches apart, and he towered over her. “Josh, huh? I definitely didn’t peg you for a Josh, but my name is Michaela, and most people call me Mich.” The tone she uttered his name caused him to take another step, his boots hitting against the box as he chuckled. “Michaela, I like that. Josh is a common name, but your name is different; I like different.” The apples of her cheeks turned a light shade of pink, but before she could utter another line, he felt a dainty palm rest against his leather jacket. “She has a boyfriend.” Michaela shifted her green eyes to the girl behind him, nodding her head as she scooped the box in her arms. “Yes, I have a boyfriend.” She stood upward as the box was pressed against her chest.

“It was nice to meet you; let’s go, Lina.” Before Josh could speak, the other brunette stood beside Michaela, and with a couple of blinks of his eyelids, she was gone.

Josh didn’t know what came over him, but he had to know her; he needed to know her. 

“Michaela,” He stated, his tongue wetting his lips as he turned on the balls of his boots. “You will be mine.”

“𝘐𝘧 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘳𝘢𝘪𝘯, 𝘐 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘢 𝘥𝘳𝘪𝘻𝘻𝘭𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘢 𝘩𝘶𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘤𝘢𝘯𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥𝘯'𝘵 𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘦𝘯𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘩𝘶𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘤𝘢𝘯𝘦 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸𝘯 𝘢𝘴 𝘔𝘪𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘦𝘭𝘢."